Fear of Regret: A None Reason to live


  • Why do I really think that the purpose of living is to avoid regret?
  • Why do u have regrets even now ?
  • Why am I not learning and evolving ?
  • Why is the past enslaving me and ruining my taste buds of the present ?
  • Why should less savory moments lead to inability to process life outside avoiding regret?

Regret is not about Fun and Pleasure

  • When I was in high school, I was so busy trying to be head boy (student body President) and have a good name. I didn’t date the woman I loved, and I didn’t break rules and have fun.
  • This led to being in college and just beginning to figure out how to have a conversation with women. When my mates were slaying them.
  • By the last year of college, my mates were popping off marriage questions and buying ring, and I was excited to earn a degree and make my parents proud. See, I didn’t grow up with silver spoon but I grew up around people with gold ones.
  • My first few years as an employee, I couldn’t Believe that I was making money. I spent that money in my savings account. It went nowhere. I was in the pinnacle of my goals. I had achieved my life’s dreams in under a year or two — I can now walk into any store and be able to afford anything my eyes laid on.
  • While my peers are having kids. I was dealing with the first real breakup of my life.
  • So here I am. Late. Full of regrets.
  • Becoming head boy will make my resume and portfolio very attractive and eligible for US based schools to see how distinguished I am and offer me scholarship since my parents cannot afford full price. Regret would have been to fail to get admission to a US school that my parents could afford paying me through after scholarship is applied.
  • Finishing college with good GPA in order to get a job is the whole reason my parents borrowed so much money to pay me through college. I cannot afford to get kicked out of school or even take an extra semester to finish. My school was a strict Christian school that didn’t allow contact between the sexes. Regret would have been to get kicked out because I kissed or smooched a woman.
  • I’m now in the US, with a few GRE and with a job. Regret was that if anything happened immigration or otherwise and I have to return to Nigeria that I would show up and have no money saved or nothing to show for having come so far.
  • And now, I have met incredible people women and men. I have been blessed with deep meaningful relationships. Regret is making a consequential decision to me one of the most important decisions in life on to look back and realize that it was made out of lust, fear, pride and measuring up.
  • Yes, you lost a friend
  • Yes, you will not see him again
  • Yes, you didn’t spend enough time hanging out before he died.
  • Yes, you said a mean word to him the day before he died.
  • Yes, YOU need to GRIEVE.
  • Bonus: So that you don’t regret not grieving them properly.
  • The equation of life requires balance. To gain, there must be loss. To go, there must be letting go. To remain, there must be resistance.
  • He is a loss that is the cost to save the lives of so many.
  • The bigger regret would be to gain him and lose the mission.

What am I really saying?

  • Love the moments available
  • Cherish relationships in your horizon
  • Invest in good
  • Spend on projects dear to your heart
  • Find your purpose or that reasons that makes it all meaningful and worth it.
  • Give your time generously without de-prioritizing yourself




I’m an aspiring story teller that is learning to let stories tell their own morals. You’ll find me where Faith-Tech-Art meet.

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Adedolapo Olisa

Adedolapo Olisa

I’m an aspiring story teller that is learning to let stories tell their own morals. You’ll find me where Faith-Tech-Art meet.

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